Some are convinced that Onesiphorus was dead because Paul uses the
word οἶκος. But look at 1 Cor.
16:15 where the head of that “house” was not dead, and where “house” is used
because its head was not the only member who ministered. How did Onesiphorus
get to Rome? Not by mere chance. May we not assume that when Paul’s appeal
reached Ephesus, when all to whom it was addressed turned away, the whole
family of Onesiphorus gladly let him go to Rome to do what he could for Paul?
Yes, Paul had to write “house” here and in 4:19.
Others rely only on v. 18a to support their opinion that Onesiphorus
was dead. Strange, indeed, for then the two prayers should be reversed, the
prayer for Onesiphorus himself should be first, the prayer for his bereaved
family second. Moreover, if the father had died recently, “comfort” should be
Paul’s prayer for the family and not just “mercy,” some word from Paul that
reflects the bereavement. That word, too, should be found in the prayer for the
family (this to be placed second) and not in a prayer for the dead man. We have
never seen Paul fail in a tender situation; he always knows just what to say
and just where and how to say it. If this man had just died, I for one cannot
conceive that Paul would write as he does. The family evidently lived in Ephesus,
for Paul sends greetings through Timothy. Some think that, although he had left
Rome when Paul wrote, it was not to make a direct return home, but that is only
a surmise. In both prayers we have the aorist optative of wish. (R.
C. H. Lenski, The Interpretation of St. Paul’s Epistles to the Colossians,
to the Thessalonians, to Timothy, to Titus and to Philemon [Columbus, Ohio:
Lutheran Book Concern, 1937], 773-74)
